You are still there in my thoughts

You are still there in my thoughts, 
Still I can feel the warmth of your love, 
I can hear the rhythm of your heart, 
I can sense the closeness of yours. 
Though you stepped out from my room. 
You are still there in my thoughts. 

Want to live those moments back again, 

Which we spent together in the course of time,
We were we, now we became you and me. 
You are miles and miles apart from me, 
Though I can feel the warmth of your love. 

You are still there in my thoughts. 

Want to live your love back again,

I love the way you loved me,

Love the way you hold me in your arms,

Love the way you touch my lips with yours,

Though I can’t live the moments back again.

You are still there in my thoughts.

Want to feel your tender love again,

Want to get embraced in your arms again,

I can feel the passion of your devotion,

I still can feel the warmth of your love,

Though we are miles and miles apart.

You are still there in my thoughts.

Wanna love you as I loved u again,

Wanna be with as had ever before.

Wanna sleep in your cozy arms again,

I know we can’t live those moments back

Though I want to live them back again,

You are still there in my thoughts. 

You are still alive somewhere inside my soul,

You are close to me but you are still unseen,

You are not alive for this world but somewhere,

You are immortal within me for eternal time,

Our love & you may not be alive any more,

Though I want to fall in love with you again.

You are still there in my thoughts.

Holi

She was sitting at a corner in that in-house ground; poured in color and not playing Holi with anyone.

I, Rati, Anjali, Jaggu and few of our friends were at Anjali’s place to celebrate Holi. It’s around 1 in the afternoon and everybody was engrossed in throwing colors and teasing each other. Anjali lives in joint family and her house is huge like palace because all her relatives live in same house. And while celebrating any festival she and her cousins calls their friends at their house only.

I went to Rati and asked her “why you are not playing Holi?”

“Don’t talks to me go away!!!” she just shouted on me.

What was my fault? I only asked her why she is not playing Holi that’s it. That was not an offending question to react so much. I just sat next to her.

“I am sorry.” She mutters.

“It’s okay” I said “but why are you so angry?” I asked her.

“I don’t like somebody to pour color on me.” She said in rage.

“Oh!! That is the reason you are angry.” I said “you want to wash the color?” I asked her.

“Yes” she replied “but here it is not possible as too many people are here.”

“Would you like to come to my home?”

“How far it is?”

“Not more than 10 minutes.”

“Let me inform Anjali” she said. “Anjali…, Anjali….” She yelled for her.

“What happen? Why are you shouting?” Anjali shouted on her

“I am going to her place to wash this color.”

“But why? Everybody is playing Holi and you should join us.” Anjali said

“You know very well I do not like these colors.” Rati said

“It’s okay Anjali let her wash.” I said

“Fine Priya. But be careful she is notorious naughty.” Anjali said.

We then came to my house. She washed her colors and we were then having tea and watching TV. It’s around 3 pm.

“So why you do not like to play colors?” I asked her.

“Since childhood I don’t like and so I don’t.”

“I had a friend like you she also doesn’t like to play Holi. And her name is also Rati.” I said.

“You had a friend what do you mean?”

“We got separated after 9^th class and we never met till today.”

“Where she went then?”

“I heard that she shifted to Nagpur with her family but I don’t know.”

“Which school you from?”

“City Public School” I said “but why you are asking me so many things?”

“Because that’s me idiot!!!” she said zealously and she hugged me.

I too recalled all the memories and I couldn’t stop myself and I kissed her on lips and we engrossed in kisses and hugs…

“I missed you so much idiot… I love you”

“I love you too Rati, don’t leave me. Will you marry me?”

“Yes” and we were in each other’s arm and we started crying….

Cigarette

Somebody rang the bell…

I was on bed preparing my project report. My mobile was next to me, some news was going on. I keep TV on just because it keeps me awake. It was around 6 in the evening some red-orange light was still there on my bed.

I was thinking to go out for smoke. And the doorbell rang again. I jumped off from my bed and opened the door. It was a wonder beyond that Neeraj was on door.

“Hey what happened?” I enquired.

“Can I get 110 packs of cigarette the brand you buy?”

I thought for a while that how he came to know that I have stock of cigarette.  Neeraj was a shopkeeper just opposite to my room. He has a small shop of daily need products. He was good looking guy, average built up, stands around six feet from ground and a graduation pass out three year back.

“But I am not a shopkeeper; I don’t have so many packs of cigarette.”

“Don’t gag Prashant, I know you have my neighbor told me, she do cleaning at your house.”

Now I was not left with any excuse and have to accept that yes I have packs.

“Okay, but why you want so many packs now?”

“I got an order of 150 packs from a customer for their party and I have only 40 packs so I thought let me take them from you.” He said “but I wanted to know when you do not smoke then why you buy?” He completed.

“Because I like you and it gives me a chance to see you and meet you and to talk to you.” I replied.

I generally buy a pack of cigarette and stay at his shop, talking to him for hours and hours, sometimes about his studies, sometimes about life, sometimes about news.

“Then why you never told me this, idiot” he said “I like you too…” he completed and took me in his arms without taking my permission and I couldn’t resist him. I was feeling like as if I got everything and I embraced him too. We were at door steps without caring about anybody we were in each other’s arms, holding more and more firmly… 

No more I was left...

I can able to hear those loud raps on the door of my flat…. Too many times doorbell ranged….

I wanted to open the door but I wasn’t. 

The fan is now acting like a hot air blower.  

My two fishes were rested in peace in that ashy water and rest were about to settle down on floor…

I was on bed stoned, staring the ceiling of my organized room. Water less eyes with some water mark on cones. There were hundreds of unattended calls and messages...

Some ants were crawling on my body and some flies were presenting their opera..

I then thought lets go back to open the door but I couldn’t did so. I rather, peeped out from that door to see who all were there on the other side. I saw my neighbors, building secretory, my landlord and some cops were there outside the door. Tremors of fear ran down through my veins, I was thinking what they are going to do now...

Mr. Philip presented the keys to the cop and a sergeant opened the door… the whole flat was full of my odor and I was lying on bed in my bedroom. They all kept sniffers on their faces and moved into my bedroom. Everything was well organized but organizer was passed away… I was dead. No more desire and no more I was left…

Hi Readers,

I started this blog to give an insight about the life of those people who are the integral part of our society but we think they do not exists or their existence is sin. 
I am working with and for those minority people and I proud that I am the part of this minority.
It is not very common in India that a guy is loving a guy or a girl is loving a girl. This is always taken as offence and were never accepted so far. There are few case where such acceptations have been done and wholeheartedly done. But there were many rejections too and we cannot ignore this. We also, cannot ignore this fact that they are the integral part of society. 
Here, the minority about which I am talking is "Homosexual People".  It is never borne by choice o but it is by birth. They too have equal rights to live and enjoy there life. Cherish there dreams and love with someone of there choice.
From now on wards I will try my best to explain what is Homosexuality and other aspects of this life. 
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https://www.facebook.com/mayank7725